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Learn how to build habits that stick with practical strategies, biblical wisdom, and tiny steps that truly transform your daily life.

S3E4 – Clarifying Your Mission: Influence, Ministry, & Your Why – A More Beautiful Life Collective Podcast

Do you ever feel like you’re surviving instead of thriving? Like the days are full, but the things that matter most seem to slip through your fingers?
That’s exactly where I found myself this past summer. July and August were full of travel—an anniversary trip to the UK, a church retreat, and time at the beach. Then, right when I thought we’d settle back into a routine, the kids got sick. Every rhythm I had built into my life just… collapsed.
Suddenly, my mornings felt chaotic. My prayer time disappeared. My house felt messy. And instead of feeling steady, I felt scattered.
That experience reminded me of something: when my habits crumble, my peace crumbles with them.
But here’s the hopeful truth: habits aren’t just productivity hacks. They’re what quietly shape our hearts, our homes, our health, and our spiritual lives. Habits form who we are becoming. And as Christians, we have to ask: What—or Who—are my habits forming me to worship?
In this post, I want to share how to build habits that actually stick. These are principles I first learned during my five years as a teacher—where every minute of the day was portioned out—but that I’m learning all over again now as a homeschooling mom.
Whether you’re trying to start small habits like unloading the dishwasher daily or big ones like exercising consistently or deepening your prayer life, the principles are the same. Let’s break them down.
Why Habits Shape Your Life
James Clear, in his book Atomic Habits, says:
“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”
That struck me. Because if we spend 40% of our day on automatic pilot (according to Duke University research), then our habits aren’t just something we do—they’re something we’re constantly becoming.
- If you read every night before bed, you’re becoming a reader.
- If you pray before meals, you’re becoming someone who acknowledges God in the ordinary.
- If you scroll Instagram first thing in the morning… you’re becoming someone whose first voice isn’t God’s but the world’s.
Justin Whitmel Earley, in The Common Rule, calls this “habit-based formation.” Every small choice has a formative effect. As Proverbs 14:1 reminds us, “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.”
The question is: what kind of house are you building with your habits?
Step 1: Start With Your Aspirations
Before you ever write down a single goal or habit, you have to ask: Who do I want to become?
When I was teaching, my aspiration was simple: I wanted to be the kind of teacher whose students felt seen. That meant the habit of greeting every student at the door, every single day.
Now, as a mom beginning my homeschool journey, my aspiration looks different. I want to create a home where peace, wisdom, and joy are the atmosphere my kids grow up in. That aspiration shapes everything else.
Maybe your aspiration is:
- “I want to be a runner.”
- “I want to be a reader.”
- “I want to be a present, joyful mom.”
Your aspiration becomes the north star. Habits are just the daily bricks that build it.
Practical reflection: Write down your aspiration. Then ask: “What would someone with that identity do every day?”
Step 2: Turn Aspirations Into Goals
Here’s the catch: aspirations are inspiring, but they’re also vague. To make progress, you need to shape them into specific goals.
For example:
- Aspiration: “I want to be a runner.”
- Goal: “I will run a 5k by October.”
When I was dreaming about someday running a marathon, I couldn’t just lace up my shoes and go 26.2 miles. I had to start with a goal that fit where I was—a simple couch-to-5k plan.
SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-based) help here. They force you to take your aspiration and anchor it in reality.
But here’s the warning: goals without habits are fragile. You might set a big goal, but unless you create daily habits that support it, the goal will stay out of reach.
Step 3: Build Habits That Support Your Goals
Think of habits as scaffolding. They hold up your goals until they become strong enough to stand on their own.
When my mornings were falling apart this summer, I realized one tiny habit made all the difference: unloading the dishwasher right after coffee. It seems so small. But when I did that, my whole day flowed more smoothly.
Why? Because every breakfast, lunch, and dinner afterward was calmer. That one small habit became the anchor for a bigger aspiration: creating a home of peace.
Practical step: Do a quick “time audit.” Where is your time actually going? For most of us, it’s surprising—scrolling, streaming, or procrastinating eats up more than we think. Once you see it clearly, you can choose habits that align better with your goals.
If you want to work through the process of creating a schedule that helps you to build in these habits, download the free Gentle Rhythms guide below.
Step 4: Make Habits Stick With Tiny Steps
Here’s where most people get stuck: we try to go too big, too fast.
BJ Fogg, in his book Tiny Habits, says that small is powerful. You don’t start by running a marathon; you start by putting on your shoes.
- Want to pray more? Start with one verse before you check your phone.
- Want to exercise? Start with five pushups when you brush your teeth.
- Want to read more? Put a book on your pillow every morning.
This is where habit stacking comes in. Take something you already do and “stack” a new habit onto it.
For me, it looked like this:
- Coffee → unload dishwasher → open Bible.
Three tiny steps, linked together, transformed my mornings.
Remember: willpower is limited. The more you automate habits through small steps, the less you rely on willpower and the more they become who you are.
Step 5: Shape Life-Giving Rhythms
Not all habits are created equal. Some drain us. Some fill us. The key is to choose rhythms that give life.
Sally Clarkson often writes about creating a “life-giving home.” That means asking: does this habit actually move me toward joy, peace, and presence—or does it drain me of them?
I learned this the hard way when I tried working out at a gym that required complicated childcare logistics. The stress of getting there made the habit unsustainable. Instead, shifting to at-home workouts fit our family rhythm better—and that made the habit last.
Ask yourself: Is this habit life-giving in this season? If not, how can I adjust it?
Step 6: Redeem Habits as Worship
At the heart of it, every habit is a form of worship.
- When I reach for my Bible before my phone, I’m saying: “God, You’re first.”
- When I choose gratitude over grumbling, I’m shaping my heart toward praise.
- When I scroll endlessly instead of engaging my kids, I’m worshipping distraction.
Justin Earley puts it plainly: “You are what you worship, and you worship what you habitually do.”
That’s why habits aren’t just about efficiency. They’re about faithfulness. Every small daily choice is an act of worship that either builds my house or tears it down.
A Practical Habit-Building Toolkit
If you’re ready to start, here are some simple tools to help:
- Make a habit list. Write down your current daily habits. Circle which ones are life-giving and cross out which ones aren’t.
- Choose one new habit. Just one. Don’t try to overhaul your life all at once.
- Use a habit tracker. You can get the full workbook with a habit tracker here.
- Pair habits with goals. If your aspiration is to be a present mom, ask: what one small habit supports that today?
- Build accountability. Share your habit goal with a friend, spouse, or small group.
If you want a structured way to connect your aspirations, goals, and habits, I created the Cultivate Workbook to walk you through the process step by step.

Cultivate: A Faithful Framework for Aspirations, Goals & Habits – Christian Goal
Start Small, Build Steady, Live Faithful
Habits are the quiet builders of our lives. They may feel small in the moment, but over time, they form who we are becoming.
If you want to build habits that stick:
- Start with your aspiration—who you want to become.
- Turn that into a goal.
- Create small, daily habits that support it.
- Make them tiny, stack them, and choose life-giving rhythms.
- Redeem your habits as acts of worship.
The good news? You don’t have to get it perfect. You just have to start small and stay steady.
Because ultimately, the habits that matter most are the ones that point us back to peace, beauty, and God Himself.
Helpful Resources:
- The Purpose Planner by A More Beautiful Life Collective on Etsy
- Habits Guide & Booklist
- Atomic Habits by James Clear
- The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg
- Tiny Habits by B.J. Fogg
- Habits of the Household by Justin Whitmel Earley
- The Common Rule by Justin Whitmel Earley
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