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How to Build Habits That Stick: A Christian Perspective on Lasting Change

Learn how to build habits that stick with practical strategies, biblical wisdom, and tiny steps that truly transform your daily life.

S3E4 – Clarifying Your Mission: Influence, Ministry, & Your Why A More Beautiful Life Collective Podcast

In Season 3, Episode 4 of A More Beautiful Life Collective podcast, we're exploring why clarifying your “why” is the keystone to living with purpose and avoiding burnout. We unpack how hustling without direction leads to overcommitment, comparison, and exhaustion, while a God-given mission statement provides traction, focus, and freedom to say no. Learn to align gifts, burdens, and seasons with your calling, filter decisions through a simple mission, and turn everyday influence—parenting, ministry, creative work—into fruitful Kingdom impact. Perfect for Christian women seeking intentional living, faith-centered productivity, and clarity of purpose.Read the full post here: https://amorebeautifullifecollective.com/clarifying-your-mission-influence-ministry-your-why/Get the 30 Days to a Life You Love Challenge here: https://amorebeautifullifecollective.com/product/30-days-to-a-life-you-love-challenge-tracker-slow-living-printable-tracker-faith-simplicity-peace/Get the Full Life You Love Toolkit here: https://amorebeautifullifecollective.com/product/a-life-you-love-toolkit-christian-intentional-living-planner-toolkit-for-women/Get the Build a More Beautiful Life: 5 Days to Align Your Faith, Family and Work here: https://amorebeautifullifecollective.com/product/build-a-more-beautiful-life-faith-and-family-devotional-workbook-5-day-christian-pdf-to-align-faith-family-and-work/Get The Faithful 12 Goal-setting Kickstart Planner Here: https://amorebeautifullifecollective.com/product/your-12-week-year-pdf-guide/ Get Cultivate: A Faithful Framework for Aspirations, Goals & Habits here: https://amorebeautifullifecollective.com/product/cultivate-a-faithful-framework-for-aspirations-goals-habits-christian-goal-setting-workbook-faith-based-planner-printable/ …Visit our Shop to get a copy of any of the resources mentioned in this episode: I’m your host, Cayce Fletcher, and you can ​learn a little bit more about me here​. While you’re here, would you consider leaving a comment, rating, or review? You can find our podcast, ​A More Beautiful Life Collective Podcast​, wherever you listen to podcasts. Listen on ​Spotify​ or ​Apple Podcasts​, or watch on ​YouTube​. Subscribe to the blog for access to our latest content and some freebies. I love creating and sharing resources with you. You can find all of our resources at ​A More Beautiful Life Collective Shop​.Keep creating a life you love, and cultivating your heart for God. 
  1. S3E4 – Clarifying Your Mission: Influence, Ministry, & Your Why
  2. S3E3 – How to Dream Boldly and, Live Faithfully: Moving From Ideas to Action
  3. S3E2 – A Life You Actually Want to Live (And How to Start Today)
  4. S3E1 – Becoming the Woman You Want to Be
  5. S2E29 – How to Celebrate Lent as a Protestant

how to build habits that stick

Do you ever feel like you’re surviving instead of thriving? Like the days are full, but the things that matter most seem to slip through your fingers?

That’s exactly where I found myself this past summer. July and August were full of travel—an anniversary trip to the UK, a church retreat, and time at the beach. Then, right when I thought we’d settle back into a routine, the kids got sick. Every rhythm I had built into my life just… collapsed.

Suddenly, my mornings felt chaotic. My prayer time disappeared. My house felt messy. And instead of feeling steady, I felt scattered.

That experience reminded me of something: when my habits crumble, my peace crumbles with them.

But here’s the hopeful truth: habits aren’t just productivity hacks. They’re what quietly shape our hearts, our homes, our health, and our spiritual lives. Habits form who we are becoming. And as Christians, we have to ask: What—or Who—are my habits forming me to worship?

In this post, I want to share how to build habits that actually stick. These are principles I first learned during my five years as a teacher—where every minute of the day was portioned out—but that I’m learning all over again now as a homeschooling mom.

Whether you’re trying to start small habits like unloading the dishwasher daily or big ones like exercising consistently or deepening your prayer life, the principles are the same. Let’s break them down.

Why Habits Shape Your Life

James Clear, in his book Atomic Habits, says:

“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”

That struck me. Because if we spend 40% of our day on automatic pilot (according to Duke University research), then our habits aren’t just something we do—they’re something we’re constantly becoming.

  • If you read every night before bed, you’re becoming a reader.
  • If you pray before meals, you’re becoming someone who acknowledges God in the ordinary.
  • If you scroll Instagram first thing in the morning… you’re becoming someone whose first voice isn’t God’s but the world’s.

Justin Whitmel Earley, in The Common Rule, calls this “habit-based formation.” Every small choice has a formative effect. As Proverbs 14:1 reminds us, “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.”

The question is: what kind of house are you building with your habits?

Step 1: Start With Your Aspirations

Before you ever write down a single goal or habit, you have to ask: Who do I want to become?

When I was teaching, my aspiration was simple: I wanted to be the kind of teacher whose students felt seen. That meant the habit of greeting every student at the door, every single day.

Now, as a mom beginning my homeschool journey, my aspiration looks different. I want to create a home where peace, wisdom, and joy are the atmosphere my kids grow up in. That aspiration shapes everything else.

Maybe your aspiration is:

  • “I want to be a runner.”
  • “I want to be a reader.”
  • “I want to be a present, joyful mom.”

Your aspiration becomes the north star. Habits are just the daily bricks that build it.

Practical reflection: Write down your aspiration. Then ask: “What would someone with that identity do every day?”

Step 2: Turn Aspirations Into Goals

Here’s the catch: aspirations are inspiring, but they’re also vague. To make progress, you need to shape them into specific goals.

For example:

  • Aspiration: “I want to be a runner.”
  • Goal: “I will run a 5k by October.”

When I was dreaming about someday running a marathon, I couldn’t just lace up my shoes and go 26.2 miles. I had to start with a goal that fit where I was—a simple couch-to-5k plan.

SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-based) help here. They force you to take your aspiration and anchor it in reality.

But here’s the warning: goals without habits are fragile. You might set a big goal, but unless you create daily habits that support it, the goal will stay out of reach.

Step 3: Build Habits That Support Your Goals

Think of habits as scaffolding. They hold up your goals until they become strong enough to stand on their own.

When my mornings were falling apart this summer, I realized one tiny habit made all the difference: unloading the dishwasher right after coffee. It seems so small. But when I did that, my whole day flowed more smoothly.

Why? Because every breakfast, lunch, and dinner afterward was calmer. That one small habit became the anchor for a bigger aspiration: creating a home of peace.

Practical step: Do a quick “time audit.” Where is your time actually going? For most of us, it’s surprising—scrolling, streaming, or procrastinating eats up more than we think. Once you see it clearly, you can choose habits that align better with your goals.

If you want to work through the process of creating a schedule that helps you to build in these habits, download the free Gentle Rhythms guide below.

Step 4: Make Habits Stick With Tiny Steps

Here’s where most people get stuck: we try to go too big, too fast.

BJ Fogg, in his book Tiny Habits, says that small is powerful. You don’t start by running a marathon; you start by putting on your shoes.

  • Want to pray more? Start with one verse before you check your phone.
  • Want to exercise? Start with five pushups when you brush your teeth.
  • Want to read more? Put a book on your pillow every morning.

This is where habit stacking comes in. Take something you already do and “stack” a new habit onto it.

For me, it looked like this:

  • Coffee → unload dishwasher → open Bible.

Three tiny steps, linked together, transformed my mornings.

Remember: willpower is limited. The more you automate habits through small steps, the less you rely on willpower and the more they become who you are.

Step 5: Shape Life-Giving Rhythms

Not all habits are created equal. Some drain us. Some fill us. The key is to choose rhythms that give life.

Sally Clarkson often writes about creating a “life-giving home.” That means asking: does this habit actually move me toward joy, peace, and presence—or does it drain me of them?

I learned this the hard way when I tried working out at a gym that required complicated childcare logistics. The stress of getting there made the habit unsustainable. Instead, shifting to at-home workouts fit our family rhythm better—and that made the habit last.

Ask yourself: Is this habit life-giving in this season? If not, how can I adjust it?

Step 6: Redeem Habits as Worship

At the heart of it, every habit is a form of worship.

  • When I reach for my Bible before my phone, I’m saying: “God, You’re first.”
  • When I choose gratitude over grumbling, I’m shaping my heart toward praise.
  • When I scroll endlessly instead of engaging my kids, I’m worshipping distraction.

Justin Earley puts it plainly: “You are what you worship, and you worship what you habitually do.”

That’s why habits aren’t just about efficiency. They’re about faithfulness. Every small daily choice is an act of worship that either builds my house or tears it down.

A Practical Habit-Building Toolkit

If you’re ready to start, here are some simple tools to help:

  1. Make a habit list. Write down your current daily habits. Circle which ones are life-giving and cross out which ones aren’t.
  2. Choose one new habit. Just one. Don’t try to overhaul your life all at once.
  3. Use a habit tracker. You can get the full workbook with a habit tracker here.
  4. Pair habits with goals. If your aspiration is to be a present mom, ask: what one small habit supports that today?
  5. Build accountability. Share your habit goal with a friend, spouse, or small group.

If you want a structured way to connect your aspirations, goals, and habits, I created the Cultivate Workbook to walk you through the process step by step.

Start Small, Build Steady, Live Faithful

Habits are the quiet builders of our lives. They may feel small in the moment, but over time, they form who we are becoming.

If you want to build habits that stick:

  • Start with your aspiration—who you want to become.
  • Turn that into a goal.
  • Create small, daily habits that support it.
  • Make them tiny, stack them, and choose life-giving rhythms.
  • Redeem your habits as acts of worship.

The good news? You don’t have to get it perfect. You just have to start small and stay steady.

Because ultimately, the habits that matter most are the ones that point us back to peace, beauty, and God Himself.

Helpful Resources

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Hi, I'm so glad your here! I'm Cayce Fletcher, a wife and mother to three little ones. I am passionate about applying God's word faithfully to every area of our lives. Join me as we create a life we love and cultivate our hearts for God.

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