Do you feel overwhelmed? This is a feeling that so many of us can relate to. Our hands are full. Our house is full. Our lives are full. And, we just can’t seem to make progress towards our goals and dreams. When you are overwhelmed, you need to pause and prioritize. These 5 questions will help you do just that.
This post is part of our series, 12 Weeks to a More Beautiful Life. This post will focus on Week 0: How to Define Our Priorities and Stop the Overwhelm Spiral.
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To Feel Overwhelmed, Just Step Through My Front Door
I stared at the kitchen counter. From one end to the other, it was piled high with stuff: dishes, trash, wrappers, toys, books, gadgets. The sink was full, too. Toys were strewn across the floor along with clothes and little strips of paper leftover from a craft.
Where should I even begin?
Honestly, every room of the house was more of the same. The laundry room is piled high with laundry and more to do. Kids’ room, toys, books, and paper all around. Living Room, pillows, and blankets leftover from a fort.
My to-do list was filled with a million tasks. I needed to email someone, order something, text someone back, and buy groceries. My bank account was dreadfully low, with more bills coming in every day.
I wanted my life to be peaceful and purposeful. For every day to be filled with intention and fulfilling work, while the morning breeze calmly wafted in the windows, rustling the handpicked flowers on a counter with no crumbs.
What I wanted from my life seemed so dreadfully far removed from what I was living.
I wanted a lovely life, but I felt stuck in the chaos. And I thought: Is this it? Is this all that I’ll ever have?
The deeper question loomed: What is so different about me that I can’t have the life they have? That I can’t match the image of the influencer I see online? Am I not disciplined enough, persistent enough, good enough?
Those little voices often come at the worst time. When we feel overwhelmed, lonely, and burnt out.
But I was reminded in that moment that a beautiful life isn’t one that is meant for a picture frame. A beautiful life is one that is laced through with intention. It is one that is built on being rooted in truth, rhythms, stewardship, learning, family culture, and meaningful work.
Those things don’t always fit into an aesthetic, but they lead to lasting fruit. Fruit that matters in light of eternity.
A Beautiful Life Despite Feeling Overwhelmed
Our ultimate goal is to look back on our life and see that it has been well-lived.
But when we have dishes in the sink and piles of laundry to fold, it can be hard to see the end goal over the work towering in front of us.
How do we live a life that is well-lived? Simply one day at a time.
Our faithful action leads to growth that results in fruit. A family that feels connected, a budget that has breathing room, and a peaceful home.
In our quarterly magazine this month, we talked about the purpose of faithfulness. Our faithful action is not always rewarded, but it is what matters in the long run.
Get the full Spring 2026 A More Beautiful Life Journal here. You’ll get recipes, articles, and ideas to cultivate a more beautiful life today.
When we feel overwhelmed by life, we have to pause, pray, and return to the work.
It may not seem like it matters, but it does. The work of caring for your home, tending to the souls of your children, and answering your call is the work that matters in light of eternity.
But it’s hard to feel like it does when we know that the work will be there again tomorrow. What are the battles we need to fight? Does it matter if our toddler’s clothes match? Does it matter if we have weeds in our flower beds? Does it matter if there are pillows on the floor?
How can we prioritize when we are in the thick of things?
Related: Goal-Setting Framework for When You Feel Burnt Out
If you are looking to develop a clear vision for how you want to integrate your work, family, and home, get the 5-day journal: Building a More Beautiful Life. You’ll refine your calling, develop rhythms, and work towards creating a more beautiful life today.
Build a More Beautiful Life | Faith and Family Devotional Workbook – 5-Day Christian PDF to Align Faith, Family, and Work
A 5-day faith and family devotional PDF to help you align your purpose, priorities, and rhythms with God’s calling. Includes scripture-based reflections, guided questions, practical worksheets, and 8 bonus encouragement cards.
5 Questions to Ask When You Feel Overwhelmed
When we feel overwhelmed, we can ask ourselves these 5 questions to help to guide our days to the work that matters in light of eternity. These questions will help you sort through what matters each day and train your heart to seek God’s kingdom first every day.
Question #1: When you feel overwhelmed, ask: What are my pain points and shame points?
There is something cathartic about really sitting down and brain dumping about why we feel overwhelmed. It could be as simple as having a house that just stays messy or as complicated as strained relationships and a mountain of debt.
Writing it down doesn’t mean that you have an answer for your problem. You are simply acknowledging it.
I like to focus on two areas: (1) pain points and (2) shame points.
Pain points are the areas that can’t help but trigger you. When you see or experience these things, you begin to have that niggling feeling of annoyance that quickly takes over. Jot those down and get your feelings out.
Shame points are similar but are focused on the areas of life that feel overwhelming. These are areas you feel like you should have already figured out. Our homes, bodies, finances, and the behavior of our children can often fit into these categories. We often want to hide these areas, but it’s important to bring them out into the light. Write them down.
Question #2: When you feel overwhelmed, ask: What do I want my life to look like?
What would your ideal day look like? What about your ideal week? How do you want to look? What do you want to feel? What do you want to experience?
I find it helpful to think through our ideals in each area of life. Your ideal life may look very different from mine. As an empty nester, your ideal may be full of days on the road in your camper. For me, my ideal is a calm and clean home. But, whatever the answer is, the power of the question is that it begins to get at something very important: What do you actually want?
Your pain points and shame points contribute to your feeling of overwhelm, but just acknowledging them probably won’t fix the overall problem. You have to figure out what you really want and begin to build a beautiful life in that direction.
For instance, if your finances are a shame point, you need to figure out what your ideal picture would look like. What does a good financial picture look like to you? Is it funding your kid’s college? Is it paying off your home? Is it paying down debt?
When I answer this question, I like to imagine the ideal. Play it out like a story in your mind. What does it look like to be a person in your ideal life?
Question #3: When you feel overwhelmed, ask: What is going to matter in 25 years? What will matter at the end of your life?
When we are in the middle of any difficult situation, we can just put our heads down and start pushing through. We don’t make decisions based on goals. We are just getting through. It can be helpful to pull ourselves out of that for a moment and ask what will matter in 25 years. When the kids are grown. When we are nearing retirement (or maybe approaching the end of our retirement years).
What will matter? Will the dishes in the sink matter? Will the laundry matter? Will the specific homeschool lesson you are working on matter?
The answer is not always a clear yes or no. One load of dishes left till morning doesn’t matter, but a home that is never clean might. One homeschool lesson doesn’t matter, but a child who learns that it’s optional to finish work might. One missed work deadline doesn’t matter, but if it becomes a pattern of flakiness, it just might.
We have to approach each area of life with discernment and sift through our moments in light of eternity. Asking yourself these questions can get you started on the path to using your time wisely.
Question #4: When you feel overwhelmed, ask: What are my priorities for this season?
Questions 1-3 will help you to refine your focus on what truly matters. You cannot do all things. You cannot be all things to all people. You have to choose what matters for the season you are in.
As a mother of young kids, I have to recognize that my days are often full of training and cleaning – and lots of margin. There are things I just can’t do right now. If you are in the middle of caring for a spouse or older family member, you may feel the same way. Your priority is caring for the people around you.
Choose 4-6 priorities that sum up the ‘best stuff’ in your life. These are the things like faith, marriage, kids, work, and other important goals to you.
I like to refine what I am hoping to do for each of the priorities so they don’t stay in a generic category.
‘Kids’ and ‘Ministry’ become ‘Discipleship towards depth, discipline, and delight.’ It is something that I am trying to do in many areas of my life, and it is a priority that I keep coming back to each day.
‘Hobbies’ and ‘Adventure’ become ‘A More Beautiful Life: Delighting in the Good, True, and Beautiful.’ I include everything from date nights to reading to hiking to crocheting in this category.
Get creative with your priorities. The more true they are to your season, the better you will be able to honor them in your life.
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Question #5: When you feel overwhelmed, ask: What is one goal or habit I can add in my life to honor this priority and get closer to my ideal life?
When I am at my most overwhelmed, I often just want to give up. My goals go out the window, and I spiral. If I can get myself out of that headspace, then I can stand up, brush myself off, and move forward.
I find I do better at living with purpose when I have a goal or habit I am trying to achieve. I spiral quicker when life is full of things that I just feel I have to do again tomorrow.
When you write out your priorities, take a moment and also brainstorm one thing that would help you to honor that priority in your life. How could you build that into your life?
For discipleship, I want to disciple my children and teach them to love the Lord. One simple step I take to do this is to do a daily devotional with them as part of their school day.
For a more beautiful life, I want to add things that help me to delight in life. One simple way I do this is to add big adventures and little adventures into my life (an idea from Laura Vanderkam’s Tranquility by Tuesday).
Related: Goal-Setting When Your Hands are Full
When you feel overwhelmed….
If you feel overwhelmed, don’t despair. Don’t give up.
You matter. Your work matters. Each day matters.
So get up, wash your face, make a cup of coffee, and ask yourself these 5 questions. You’ll end the day feeling like you have clarity to start making changes and reaching your goals.
You can build a more beautiful life from right where you are. Get the 5 day devotional, Build a More Beautiful Life, here.
I’m here cheering you on as you create the life you imagined.
Our next post will focus on how to create a planning time every morning to help you reach your goals.
Until next time, keep creating a life you love and cultivating your heart for God. I’m Cayce Fletcher, and I’ll see you back here next week.
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